I have been going through so many emotions lately. I has been a whorl wind of crazy adventures.
Last weekend I took a super fast trip to Vancouver, I got my Visa Application and Student Loan application in, all in 1 go. It was a 24 hour trip and my mum and I slept in the back of our truck. Quite an experience, the weather was horrible driving down to Vancouver. There was a nasty thunder storm, hail, buckets upon buckets of rain and I was driving most of the gross part. On the way back it was lovely. We had a wonderful drive coming home. Of course, right? Going down is so much stress, coming back you're as free as a bird. Well sort of.
However, going back to work was interesting. After doing something about college after months of not really doing much, and then suddenly doing something was hard. I just really want to be back in school. I miss going and learning things, I miss having friends that I can have conversations with (that last more then 5 minutes.) It makes me really appreciate my education. I worked for it, it wasn't just handed to me. I have put a lot of passion and emotional commitment into this, it's not just some flippant desire.
Anyway, so about more of my week. I did have a small freak out and my mum got the wrath of it. I know she has done a lot for me this past year, and getting down to the wire I am freaking out. I am so nervous, anxious, frustrated, annoyed and perplexed about so many things that we had a little row. Oh look I am already using British terms! Then she left for the weekend to spend time with her best friend, which I am glad she did. She has been under a lot of pressure and stress herself with her business, it was really unfair of me to blow up on her. Hind sight is always 20/20. I wish it was foresight is 20/20 most of the time, and when you need it to be. But sadly, that phrase is too long. I would be bored saying it after the first 5 words. But going to college is stressful enough, I had to hear about my cousin last year, and going over seas is stressful too. So both together creates a really stiff and sore neck. I could really use a massage, hint hint, wink wink. ;D
So another thing that I have accomplished, a jumpsuit that I made for my great aunt. I finally finished it! It took me such a long time because I had to go back and forth between cities and finding time between 2 jobs to actually do it. Lets just say that if I was given a giant room, her body, and 3 days. It would have been done. Well I finally got it done and she loves it! It is always a plus when the customer loves what you did. Such a good feeling, and another thing I can cross off my list before I leave. One less stresser. YAY!
The only thing that is REALLY stressing me, is my accommodation. With the Olympics right now everyone wants to think about long term tenants after the Olympics. Which I get, but it just means that EVERYTHING is going to happen in August. My flights, Visa, Student Loan, accommodation and the last days of working will all happen at the very end. I can see the finish line, I know its close, it just seems like a universe away. Until I actually get on the plane, THEN it will sink in.
But there is good news about my living situation. I have found some flatmates that are looking for a 5th person to room with them. They are just in the process of finding a place and will give me an address when they have one. As well as pictures, so I can see where I will be living. They have already assured me that I will not be sleeping with mice or cuddling with a rain bucket. They did say that I might get the cupboard under the stairs though. I almost died when they told me that. OMG HILARIOUS!
But all in all, good feelings. I just have to stay positive and remember to write things down, keep my brain uncluttered, so that I can stay focused on the plan at hand.
....and on a side note, one of my best friends and I are going to see Nicki Minaj in concert in 2 weekends. I am a LITTLE excited. It is kind of like our 'Summer treat/Au Revoir' for this year.
32 days left to make tips
35 days until I can sing "leaving on a Jet Plane"
Monday, July 30, 2012
Sunday, July 22, 2012
40-43
In the past month I have noticed that my neck is getting smaller and smaller. I thought, "Hmm, that is strange, wait, no it is not. I have been under a lot of pressure and stress." All of it I have created, I own up to that fact. No one person, but myself, put it there.
I recently got a second job, to put a little extra money to my pocket book. By doing so, I have not seen the few friends that I have in at least a week and half. It is pushing 2 weeks with every passing day. Call me over dramatic but my friends are like a little stress reliever, I think that can be said for everyone. Although in all seriousness, last night I had a little melt down, quite literally because it is so hot here. I had a night off before a week of straight working, honestly I will not have a day off until next Monday, maybe.
I start work at 6 in the morning for one job finish at 2 have a nap nad then start again at 5 or 5:30 and don't usually end working until 8 or 9 at night at the second job. Let me just say that I don't get to sit down for more than 20 minutes, sometimes I don't even sit down at these jobs, they're demanding. Just a little perspective.
Anyway, I called literally everyone I had to call. They were either busy or didn't pick up when I called. I had a 'little' breaking point. I HATE not having friends to do things with. I have been reluctant to make friends now because I will be leaving in such a short space of time. I just don't see the point to give myself and the other person that dissapointment of a failed friendship, or a lost one. I am a social butterfly, and right now I am in a cocoon, not yet flourishing. It's like waiting for Christmas morning, I am sleep deprived and miserable. Yet I know that in 43 days EVERYTHING will change, it will start being what I have imagined. It's just the waiting that is killing me.
I get an idea and want to pursue it, and I want to, well, now.
It is even hard to hear, "Oh you just have to wait a little while longer" or "I am so excited for you!" You know when you hear that for an entire year, everyday, you just want to walk away fingering the person. Seriously, like I haven't heard that already, and you don't think I am excited? It is my life that I have been dreaming about.
I think the point I am trying to convey here, I am getting antsy, and stir crazy. I have worked hard, even helping out my family when they really need me. I have been patiently been waiting ever since I got accepted. I sat by watching all my high school graduates going off to college and doing something with their lives, when I still live at home constrained to shackles that I put myself in.
I have been sitting very nicely, can I have my treat now? please?!!? *pants *puppy dog eyes
40 days left to save all the money possible
43 days until I can see my neck again.
I recently got a second job, to put a little extra money to my pocket book. By doing so, I have not seen the few friends that I have in at least a week and half. It is pushing 2 weeks with every passing day. Call me over dramatic but my friends are like a little stress reliever, I think that can be said for everyone. Although in all seriousness, last night I had a little melt down, quite literally because it is so hot here. I had a night off before a week of straight working, honestly I will not have a day off until next Monday, maybe.
I start work at 6 in the morning for one job finish at 2 have a nap nad then start again at 5 or 5:30 and don't usually end working until 8 or 9 at night at the second job. Let me just say that I don't get to sit down for more than 20 minutes, sometimes I don't even sit down at these jobs, they're demanding. Just a little perspective.
Anyway, I called literally everyone I had to call. They were either busy or didn't pick up when I called. I had a 'little' breaking point. I HATE not having friends to do things with. I have been reluctant to make friends now because I will be leaving in such a short space of time. I just don't see the point to give myself and the other person that dissapointment of a failed friendship, or a lost one. I am a social butterfly, and right now I am in a cocoon, not yet flourishing. It's like waiting for Christmas morning, I am sleep deprived and miserable. Yet I know that in 43 days EVERYTHING will change, it will start being what I have imagined. It's just the waiting that is killing me.
I get an idea and want to pursue it, and I want to, well, now.
It is even hard to hear, "Oh you just have to wait a little while longer" or "I am so excited for you!" You know when you hear that for an entire year, everyday, you just want to walk away fingering the person. Seriously, like I haven't heard that already, and you don't think I am excited? It is my life that I have been dreaming about.
I think the point I am trying to convey here, I am getting antsy, and stir crazy. I have worked hard, even helping out my family when they really need me. I have been patiently been waiting ever since I got accepted. I sat by watching all my high school graduates going off to college and doing something with their lives, when I still live at home constrained to shackles that I put myself in.
I have been sitting very nicely, can I have my treat now? please?!!? *pants *puppy dog eyes
40 days left to save all the money possible
43 days until I can see my neck again.
Friday, July 20, 2012
42 -45
So, a little bit about what is happening.
2007, Started my first Sewing class and knew that I was going to be in Fashion and desgin, for life.
November 2010, I got acctepted into the London College of Fashion.
June 2011, Graduated form Highschool.
August 2011, Defered for a year to save for college.
June 2012, Accepted a placement at the London College of Fashion.
Present, Freaking out because this all is about to happen. My life is about to be the independance that I have been dreaming about for the past 2 years. I have not been really expecting a lot form this whole ordeal, just planning for what is happening. I have small expectaions about what I am going to do while across the pond, but what I do expect, is that I am going to be learning what I want to learn. I will be interested in class, I will be have a desire to be the absolute best that I can. I will want to bring my A gtame and come home at the end of the day feeling good, like shit, or whatrever else, and know that I am feeling that way, because that is what I chose to happen. I made all of this happen, and I am feeling pretty divine about it.
I feel like I could challenge the Gods and give them a run for their money. Most likely I will loose, but I will be okay with that.
42 days left to save.
45 days until I can spend.
2007, Started my first Sewing class and knew that I was going to be in Fashion and desgin, for life.
November 2010, I got acctepted into the London College of Fashion.
June 2011, Graduated form Highschool.
August 2011, Defered for a year to save for college.
June 2012, Accepted a placement at the London College of Fashion.
Present, Freaking out because this all is about to happen. My life is about to be the independance that I have been dreaming about for the past 2 years. I have not been really expecting a lot form this whole ordeal, just planning for what is happening. I have small expectaions about what I am going to do while across the pond, but what I do expect, is that I am going to be learning what I want to learn. I will be interested in class, I will be have a desire to be the absolute best that I can. I will want to bring my A gtame and come home at the end of the day feeling good, like shit, or whatrever else, and know that I am feeling that way, because that is what I chose to happen. I made all of this happen, and I am feeling pretty divine about it.
I feel like I could challenge the Gods and give them a run for their money. Most likely I will loose, but I will be okay with that.
42 days left to save.
45 days until I can spend.
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